Unable to upload to Ai thinker ESP32 CAM, fatal no Data received

cabeling is tripple check

different CAM an FTDI used

read all relevant topics

no difference when I define correct upload port or not

no difference if I reduce upload speed to 9600 (helped in an other case, failed to upload to ESP32)

no difference if SD Card is connected or not

no blinking on FDTI RX

lastest platform IO updated today, I am on iMac Ventura 13.6.4

can anyone please help